A Breath of Air

There is something to be said about coming back to the states. As I was leaving Paris, every bone in my body was screaming, "DON'T GO!!! YOU'RE GOING TO MISS EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS!!!! The scenery, the energy, the adventure! What are you going to do in Houston? Been there, done that. Go somewhere else." And of course a certain part of me does miss all of that.

But until I got here, I didn't realize that for 8 months, I have been living with this constant... pressure.

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I just finished reading, A Year in the Merde by Stephen Clarke. I think that for a year he's been following me around. Everything that happens to him in his year in Paris was my life. In the book, he goes to restaurants I went to, to bookstores I shopped at, had visa problems that I had, and everything that he observes about the French people, I also recognized at one point in time or another. Its such a great characterization of the French people. But that's just it... there are huge differences in culture that take a lot of getting used to.

Which relates back to this certain pressure - everyday... in my job, in my social life, in my home life... I was constantly being bombarded by NEW and DIFFERENT. And as exciting as that is, it is truly relaxing to just come home to the OLD and FAMILIAR.

So I am very content to stay here for the moment. I didn't think I would ever want to. I thought I would immediately HAVE to leave. But I think I'll stay... till its time to go. And it will be... someday. But not today.